Black Ocean

Precariously treading water
much deeper than myself
I hand myself a lie
as your ego suffocates all of my intentions

I am too late for this
too late for the what that I am seeking
you're already there
pulling the thread that binds you to the moon

I silently pray to the tiny pasty thing - this, your divinity
to please just understand - I still have it in my pocket
a stone this heavy should sink straight to the bottom
falling should be effortless and obvious

yet she and I glide above the highest wave
still dizzy from the thrill

you engulf me again and again
and I slip off my will
let you take me out
further and deeper into madness

I make myself a captive
but it is you that pulls on me
you cannot resist to keep me here

counting the lovely teardrops
as they merge with your history
and dissolve into your own sorrow

you unite your kingdom
and I watch in disbelief
as I realize I am not the only one
your chaos consumes all -
all who would dare to gaze upon it

Your golden threads swim
just beneath the surface
and I take the bait
you tempt me to come inside now
and I let you swallow me whole

You laugh and I drown a little bit
too heavy this feeling
-protect the stone that grows heavy-
and im finally sinking
...sinking into you

Its strange and frightening
that this thrill should somehow continue
she said drowning is a peaceful death
and she was right

I submit - let the stone sink me
not really caring anymore
no longer asking why
as you finally are saying hello...

A scream gets strangled
as you entrapped me in your tomb
I want to laugh now at the irony of it all
but I cannot move

Yet as fall into blackness
I recognize it as an incremental gesture of something still so much larger.